rumble in the jungle

People have a real issue with farting infront of someone they've just started dating. When does it become acceptable? Does it ever besome acceptable? I hope not! I've had ex-boyfriends who've felt completely at ease farting around me. EXboyfriends. Now, we didnt break-up because they farted but I'm sure it was a factor. The F-Factor.
I refuse to fart infront of Mr.M (not that he demands I do it mind you). I'd be mortified if I let one slip by accident! As would he I suspect. But I'm only human. So it's not a matter of "if"...but "when". Also my stomach makes weird noises and I feel this compelling urge to say "I didn't fart!". But that would be equally embarrassing dammit!!
He doesn't pass gas infront of me either. So we end up holding it in. And it builds....and builds... kinda like the suspense in a straight to TV horror movie. You know something horrible may happen, but when, where and more importantly will someone die? For once it is a good idea to go outside/up the stairs/into the darkened basement and "investigate".